The Bride’s Guide to Thank You Notes

We recently made our case for thank you notes—arguing that, far from being antiquated or out of date, thank you notes remain vital ways of extending gratitude and friendship. They are especially relevant during this, the season of giving and receiving gifts.

Of course, Christmas is not the only reason why you might pen a thank you note. Another reason? You’ve recently gotten married, and have a whole stack of notes to send out for all those wedding gifts you received.

This can be daunting. Let us say from the onset that we do not recommend skipping out on thank you note writing. When you get a gift, you should take the time to write a brief note; failure to do so is just rude.

As for the nuts and bolts of post-wedding thank you notes, here are some quick tips and pointers.

Writing Thank You Notes After Your Wedding

Don’t be late! The good news is that you have plenty of time to get all your wedding thank you notes written; etiquette dictates that, so long as you get them all mailed before your one-year anniversary, you’re in good shape. Why not set aside one evening a week to write thank you notes, and write maybe 10 in each sitting? You’ll blaze through ‘em in no time!

Get the names right. There’s nothing more awkward than botching the name of a wedding guest who you really don’t know very well. If you’re not sure about the spelling of a name, always check with a friend or loved one who knows the person better!

Include the children. If someone brings their kids to the wedding, and the gift is said to be from the whole family, the kids need to be included in the thank you note. Again, double check spellings if you’re unsure.

Try to remember who was actually at your wedding. “Thank you for your presence on our special day” is an odd thing to tell someone who wasn’t actually at the ceremony, and simply mailed you their gift. If you’re at all unsure about whether the person was present on your big day, skip this part of the card.

Personalize! A thank you note doesn’t need to be more than a few short sentences, so don’t feel like you have to write a book within each one—but do go into some specifics. “Thank you for the wonderful gift” feels generic. Make note of what the gift is, how you’ve used it, what it reminds you of, etc.

Don’t mention dollar amounts. Phrases like “thank you for the $200 Target gift card” are just not necessary. Focus on people and on gratitude, not on money.

Don’t show favoritism. Don’t slip a wedding portrait into one card if you can’t do it for all of them.

Don’t type your cards. Handwritten is always the way to go.

As we said in our previous post, the real focus should be on sincerity. Take just a couple of sentences to express your deep, personal thanks; that’s all you have to do!

For help with any writing needs, reach out to the Grammar Chic team at 803-831-7444, or www.grammarchic.net.